What no one told you about when planning your wedding

Hey guys!!

First of all let me just say a huge thank you to you guys for being so patient and understanding with me as i planned my wedding...you guys understood that DIYing your own wedding is no joke and for that i'm grateful.

Now that i'm fresh from the honeymoon and the first couple weeks in my new role as his wife..(yaaass) lol i'm going to just jump right into  the meat of the matter

So, as the title suggests i will be sharing with you guys "What no one told you about when planning your own wedding".  Lets start off  with

Opinions of family members
So no one told you that there will be some family members that will get overly excited and without willingly and knowingly doing it, they impose their likes and dislike on you, they start to give THEIR opinions on things that YOU love and want for your big day, maybe one doesn't like the type of dress you like, and the other doesn't think your colors are the right one to choose because they don't like that particular color, but I say shut your ears, I for one choose black and gold for my wedding, actually my husband chose it but I liked it so we went with it, a lot of persons were saying black and gold won't go well together and even asked if it's a funeral, well guess what? Black and gold it was and the colors were amazing. I won't say don't listen entirely, but from the suggestions and opinions, stand firm to what you wanted and pictured for your big day, but also evaluate the suggestion and be open if YOU think it is something you would want.

Picking your bridal party
So, I know for most newly engaged brides you are in a rush to pick the ladies you want to be in your bridal party because its something you have dreamed of and you thought all your besties would definitely be one of your bridesmaids. You want to get the party started, so a few days after the proposal you start asking your 'main' girlfriends...But, there are a few things to consider when picking your bridesmaids. Not because they are your friends doesn't mean they will automatically be apart of the bridal party. Why?

1. Finances - one of the biggest reason for someone who you thought would be one of your bridesmaids turns out to not be one, is the issue of money. For one, here in Jamaica, gone a the days when your parents or parents of the groom foots the bill for the wedding and gone are the days when the bride foots the bill for the bridesmaids attire or even get a gift for their bridesmaids. So your bridesmaid would be required to foot the expenses of their attire themselves, and not everyone is in good financial standing to do that...sometimes not even your bestie.

2. Genuineness - Not all your girlfriends will be genuinely happy for you that you're getting married, some will try to mask the fact that they are wondering why they cant get engaged as well, while other won't know how to hide it and show you how they feel earlier on..

3. Picky- because you and your girlfriends are practically sisters they want to have a say in how and what they wear, their hair style, the color of the dress, the length of the dress, who they walk with, or even where they sit, some of them will turn out to dislike every idea you throw out and, when you come to a final decision you will still have that one bridesmaid who can't seem to agree and send out other suggestion that she likes instead....which can be annoying for the bride.

So my advise on choosing your bridesmaids is to wait a little, feel out who seem to be genuinely happy for you and your new journey, feel out who seem to be in cohesion with your choices and who understands that its your wedding so your likes trumps what they prefer...because it's your day.

Who to invite
A Wedding is a joyful moment in a woman's life and  once you make it known that you're getting married people automatically believe they're invited , some even invite themselves and pretty soon your 40-count guest list turns into a 80-count guest list.
Listen , not everybody you know will be able to be at your wedding. Let me tell you what I did.
We knew early on that we wanted a small wedding so we put a cap of 50 persons.
At times it got difficult to keep that cap but I had to ensure that I stood my  ground because that amount matched our budget. Not only that, but we wanted our wedding to be a day when we are not only surrounded by people we know, but we are surrounded by people we KNOW loves us and are genuinely HAPPY for us. I had no family at my wedding apart from my mother, father, sister (watched live from america) and brother who was apart of my bridal party,  apart from my uncle and aunt who were also the officiants of course. So don't feel sad if your cousin don't make the cut, if you genuinely do not have that kind of relationship with the person, you haven't heard from them in the last 2 - 3weeks I would say they don't need to be there. If you find yourself in a situation where you need help and you call them, will they come?  Those are some of the things you should think about before telling persons that they are invited.

When to start inviting persons verbally
With that said above I would say , get a list of ALL the Persons you'd want at your wedding then start the elimination process using the tips I mentioned , then, only then can you start verbally give your guests a heads up that they're invited to your wedding and that a formal invitation will follow soon.

Not everyone will match your level of happiness
I think I mentioned this before when I was talking about choosing your bridesmaids , but this goes for everybody., you will come across some people that you thought would be there to help you or to just be happy for you when you're talking about how he proposed or how the planning is coming along, or how perky you are to get stuff accomplished, but remember,  not everyone will match your level of enthusiasm so just be aware and don't get sad by it or confused by it, just be happy and move along.

Not everything will go as you planned
This one right here is VERY VERY important! If I didn't learn anything while planning my wedding, I learnt this!
Now, I put pen to paper and planned all that I wanted at my wedding, some things came through and other things fell through and I had to improvise, don't get me wrong, I did shed some tears and I did argue with some people, hell I even lost a couple friendships. I even remember on the day of the wedding, the musician played the song I had chosen for myself to walk down the isle to, he played it for the bridesmaids, I was so sad because that song meant so much to me and I had imagined myself walking up the isle to that song so many days and nights, but I couldn't change it and that was my song so I just had them play it again and I walked up to the very sane song...so instead of creating a scene , I just went with it so my day could go smooth...but I had to accept that, that is how life is, not everything will go according to plan and you just have to improvise or wing it.

I hope my tips helps you on your wedding planning journey, but before you go, PLEASE! Subscribe to our blog for new posts each week and leave a comment...

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